My Daughter Is Not A Mini-Me

It never occurred to me that my daughter would be different than me. Or that she would be the same as me. I am not sure what I expected as my daughter grew up, but there were some things I definitely did NOT expect.

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She likes bugs. And spiders. In fact most creepy crawly things.
I dislike all those things.
She likes fiction. She especially likes science fiction.
I love non-fiction and don’t understand sci-fi.
She love rocks. And minerals. And fossils. And gold panning.
I have never thought much about any of those things.

It’s easy to want our children to want what we want and like we like. And for them to abstain from the things we abstain from.

It would have been easy to let my fear of creepy crawlies keep her from loving them. But now she is my rescuer when I am too immobilized to kill it. And we have had some great science lessons because of her love and knowledge of those things she captures.

And I could have squelched her love of reading by forcing her into my genre of books. But then I would have missed out on some awesome books like Ender’s Game and Around The World in 80 Days. And I would not see her blossoming as an author with her own creative stories. Or hear some amazing thoughts of appreciation of the world as it is now because she compares it to the world that was and the one that could be.

God created us each unique. He gives us the freedom to be and the gift of being unique.

Sometimes it’s hard to foster that uniqueness in our children. It can be scary. I know nothing about all those things she’s interested in. It’s safer to have her be a little mini-me. I know about the things I like. But causing her to repress those likes, either by my words or actions showing I disapprove, can cause self-hatred and/or rebellion. And worst of all, can cause her to shut herself off from me.

It’s another time I have to pick my battles. There will be things in the future that will be harmful for her to find interest in. If I don’t squelch her interest in bugs, fossils, and rocks now, then in the future when I put my foot down, she will have more respect for me. My words to dissuade her will have a greater effect.

What about you? How do you handle it when your child has different likes and interests than you? How do you engage with them? Please share below and add value to others!

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